The kindness of strangers...

Today I went to Costco with my two kids. Now, I would rather take a hot poker in my eye than brave Costco on a weekend! People are rude, unaware of anyone but themselves, and deadly with their shopping carts. (See scar on the back of my heel some psycho caused by running into me at 30mph...didn't even stop to apologize as I stood there gushing blood!)

Anyway, I bought a new 37 inch TV today (see why in a later post). I had to get a flatbed cart for the TV and a normal cart for all of the other stuff I needed...I was pushing the normal cart with my daughter in it and my 11 year old son was pushing the flatcart. You can imagine how much fun we had trying to maneuver TWO carts through the place, which was packed; I was a hot mess!!! How can old people be so damn mean to kids in public? Then out of nowhere...kindness of strangers...

The TV box wasn't that heavy, but some nice guy saw me there with my two kids and my two carts and generously helped me lift it onto my cart without me even having to ask! Certainly not something I expected at Costco of all places, but was more than grateful for! Then in the parking lot,, a really nice couple offered to help me load it into my car....fast forward to me pulling into my driveway when my awesome neighbor offered to help me get it in the house.

The simple fact that 3 people offered to help me without having to ask just made my day! I'll pay it forward, I promise!

I can't open my F*ck*ng car door!

Technology is incredible isn't it? It has taken us to the moon, cured diseases, put us in constant contact with family, friends, and the world in general...what it has also done is make us a little lazy... Lulled us into relying on devices to solve problems as opposed to using good old common sense...

Point? What was my point? Ah yes, my car remote... Sorry, a bit ADHD today! I bought my first car when I was 20 years old. It was red, brand new, beautiful and ALL mine! I didn't care that my left arm was stronger than my right having to ...gasp... Roll the windows down manually, or that I actually had to insert the key into the lock to open the door.

Somewhere along the way, the Japanese geniuses thought "how cool would it be if you could unlock your car before you actually got to the door?" pretty damn cool! Enter the keyless remote entry technology that every new car manufactured since the late 90's comes equipped with.

I was so excited the first time I had a car with one. I felt I had made it..I was cool...see me and my new car that I can lock and unlock with this neat key fob....woo hoo...but the excitement wore off somewhere after the 2nd and 3rd cars I bought came with keyless entry..

Well, like all things in life you take for granted when the newness wears off, they have a way of slapping you upside the head to remind you that you are a dumb ass!

What the hell do you do when the fob stops working? It honestly takes you a few LONG minutes to realize that the good old "stick the key in the lock and turn" methodology works!

Not embarrassed to admit that this dumb ass did just that the other day when my remote stopped working... My car just would not open no matter how many times I pressed the remote...which by the way was a lot! I honestly stood there dumbfounded thinking How the eff am I going to get home if I can't open the door? OMFG!really?? Quite a humbling experience...

That and the fact that when I did break the seal and use the key to open my door, I discovered that the jerks at Honda made it so the key sets off the alarm and the car won't start until you push a button to disable the alarm...a little nugget that I didn't learn until this morning when I came to get the magic fob fixed...Apparently there was a "notice" that went out..a notice I never received... A notice that would have saved me the embarrassment of having my boss, who parks behind me, walk out and hear my alarm going off and me cussing up a storm...do you know how loud a car alarm is in a parking garage??? And how many cuss words I know? It was awesome!!

Yes...technology is wonderful...But the good old fashioned manual use of your brain should never be taken for granted!

Filter? What the hell is it and how do I get one?

Seriously! I have a chronic disease. In layman's terms it is called diarrhea of the mouth. By definition it means spewing forth every thought and feeling in your head without hesitation resulting in complete embarrassment, regret, and hurt feelings.

The root cause is that I feel EVERYTHING! And because I feel everything, my mind is constantly running. I cannot shut it off no matter how hard I try. There is no magic pill and while age has helped, it hasn't cured it by any means. Mix that with my direct, strong personality and you have the perfect storm.

I am a nice person. I care about everyone (some more than I should). I want people to feel good. I feel joy when people share exciting news. I feel pain for people who are suffering. I cry when I watch infomercials for St. Jude's Children's hospital. The problem is, without a filter, sometimes I over share my feelings and those feelings don't always come across the way I want them to.

I don't want to stop feeling. I don't want to stop caring, or sharing my thoughts. But I need a filter...

I'm disappointed that modern medicine has come up with a little blue pill to make an erection last for 4 hours, but has no fucking idea how to create a pill to stop this disease...

I'm thinking if I were a scientist and wanted to impress the shit out of the world, I would spend my life working on those medications..